


achilles' heel

by 1stwins



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Friends Choi Soobin & Choi Yeonjun, Character Study, Choi Soobin Is Bad At Feelings, Light Angst, M/M, psych major hueningkai, soobin is pessimistic about love, yeonjun has the mind of a mastermind
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-12
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-16 18:00:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28710864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1stwins/pseuds/1stwins
Summary: "Many people love and are in love. Choi Soobin had witnessed it his whole life. How could one not? It seems that loving is something universal, a language of its own, and an emotion that connects all forms of life."Choi Soobin is a college sophomore who is pessimistic towards love and swore it off in high school. His best friend, Choi Yeonjun, thinks a relationship is what Soobin needs. Enter Hueningkai, a mysterious pretty boy and college freshman who needs help with his psychology project. Choi Soobin not only helps Kai with his project but finds himself learning about love in the process (and maybe falling in love too).
Relationships: Choi Soobin/Huening Kai
Comments: 6
Kudos: 28





	achilles' heel

**Author's Note:**

> hello, this is my first sookai and txt fic (and my first time writing in a while actually). i was so inspired to write one day and started this spontaneously. there are two more chapters (i'm currently still writing, but posted this as motivation to finish the rest.) sorry if there are any mistakes i didn't catch, i hope you enjoy reading! <3

Love. 

Love and loving have been a subject of much discourse and discussion since the beginning of time. With this discourse also came the question of whether love is innate in all living things, humans particularly. It could be argued as such. Love is everywhere in the world, from acts of kindness to familial bonds and the way a mother duck takes care of her little duck children. 

Loving is also something that comes naturally to most, creeps up on you even when you don’t want it to or without you knowing, causes people to become so fond. Love is a soft, visible thing, can be seen in the way a stranger’s eyes gloss over fondly as they smile and look at their lover. Love can even be tangible, felt in a soft embrace and a pat on the back as consolation is offered to another; felt in the way someone’s fingers ever so softly dance across skin to intertwine with a lovers. _Love is patient, love is kind. _Love is love.__

____

__

Many people love and are in love. Choi Soobin had witnessed it his whole life. How could one not? It seems that loving is something universal, a language of its own, and an emotion that connects all forms of life. This, like everything else in the world, did not fall blind to the eyes of capitalism. Money makes the world go round and love sells. Movies, novels, music; love is sold and put on a platter for the whole world to see. 

Soobin didn’t want to fall victim to love. He’d seen the way it could ruin you through friends of his, how it starts sweetly with a promise yet only seems to cause problems and heartache. More often than not Soobin had seen love fail. He didn’t hate love, hate is a strong word, but he didn’t want involvement in it either. He’d deemed that Soobin and love were simply two things that couldn’t go together. 

Soobin was a bit of a pessimist, yes he’d admit it. But he’d also argue that he only toed the line of realism, and as a result, love became something he wanted to avoid and not spend his time on. Soobin had other things to worry about. He was a broke college sophomore and his grades his first year wasn’t something he was particularly proud of. He needed focus in his life, and love was merely a distraction (among many other things). He’d never given love much thought after he swore it off in high school anyway, but he found himself pondering these things because of his friend Yeonjun. 

Yeonjun, a man of many lovers since their friendship bloomed in high school freshman year, insisted that what Soobin needed was a relationship. Soobin found that outlandish. What he needed was to devote more time to studying. Soobin knew Yeonjun never really took no for an answer though, and the smirk he gave him after their conversation ended (one in which he propositioned that Soobin should find a significant other) filled him with a bit of dread. Yeonjun was definitely plotting. 

In theory, Soobin had never even really liked a person romantically. He’d never had a teen crush like he’d seen in so many cringe-inducing films, never pined for someone in a class of his desperately and to the point of no return. The most that’s ever happened in his miserable love life is him finding Beomgyu cute when they first met and staring a bit more than he probably should’ve been, only for Beomgyu to give him a charismatic wink later and declare he didn’t swing that way. Embarrassing on Soobin’s behalf, and he’s still teased about it to this day. He and Beomgyu are still good friends. 

So, Soobin had at least known that he was into guys, but besides being a bit stunned by his handsome straight friend, nothing much had ever come of it. Soobin would prefer if it stayed that way. 

He’s thinking about this whilst laying on his bed one Saturday evening, textbook open beside him (and calling his name) when Yeonjun barges into his dorm. Soobin luckily has a dorm room alone, but it really doesn’t feel that way sometimes from how often Yeonjun invites himself in. Soobin doesn’t mind and he’d never admit it, but a friend as clingy as Yeonjun does wonders in quelling the loneliness that consumes him at times. This particular Saturday evening changes the trajectory of Soobin’s entire twenty year old life. 

Yeonjun enters with an evil little smile, and trailing behind him is the prettiest boy Soobin has probably seen in his life (sorry, Beomgyu). Yeonjun closes the door behind the two of them and enter pretty boy wearing a lilac sweater, darling brown eyes flitting around Soobin’s dorm curiously, a head of curly brown hair and a pair of pretty lips sparking Soobin’s interest (much to his dismay).

Soobin’s dorm isn’t much, a small bed against the left wall with a window across, a wooden table in the center, a brown warn couch against the right wall, a pitiful kitchen set up beside the door, and a bathroom that’s not much either but gets the job done. There are a few posters here and there and a plant in front of his window that he tends to because it’s something to do other than drown in coursework. All in all, it’s a boring college dorm and he’s suddenly conscious about someone so pretty seeing it. That’s new. 

Soobin sits up in his bed and looks at Yeonjun with a dirty gaze before the lilac sweater pretty boy can see. What the hell is Choi Yeonjun planning?

“Who’s this?” Soobin tries to sound indifferent, not let the extent of his interest show. 

The pretty boy turns from looking at Soobin’s plant by the window to look him in the eye, and Soobin holds his gaze for about three seconds before he looks away and glues his eyes back to Yeonjun. He can’t even shamelessly stare, he suddenly feels oddly aware of his every move. Is it rude to wait this long before introducing himself? He’d never cared before. 

“This is my new friend Hueningkai. He’s a freshman psychology major and he has a little project I think you’d be great to help with.” Yeonjun still has that stupid knowing smirk on his face and Soobin wants to smack it off. 

“Hi, um I’m Hueningkai but you can just call me Kai. I felt bad about barging in without asking first by the way but Yeonjun… well, you know Yeonjun.” Yeah, Soobin knows Yeonjun. He knows just what pretty boy means by that. 

Kai is looking at him again and gives a cute giggle before looking down at the notepad he’d brought with him.

Kai… he has a voice like honey and a cute giggle and the prettiest brown eyes, so who is Soobin to say no to helping him for whatever project he’s doing? Faintly, Soobin knows he’s in red territory and going against every little boundary he’s built for himself involving love. But he argues with the part of his brain he should be listening to and reasons he’s just doing the right thing. He’d be terrible if he didn’t help a freshman in need. Yeah, that’s it.

“I’m Soobin. Choi Soobin. You can call me… Soobin. Um, sure what’s the project about.” Yeonjun and Kai both laugh at how awkward and absolutely stupid he sounds, and Soobin feels just a bit embarrassed. 

Yeonjun leaves the two shortly after to “leave them to it”, but before he can get out the door Soobin makes sure to let him know they’ll talk later. The talk topic of course is why he decided to take it upon himself to throw a pretty boy at him and ruin Soobin’s life. 

The project, Soobin learns that night is the first from Kai’s psychology class (which he is so cutely excited and passionate about, the subject clearly being one that the boy is very interested in). The project entails an experiment that business major Soobin doesn’t quite understand the mechanics of, only that Kai would need to see him twice again within the month to ask him a question and gauge his answer. Kai’s notepad contained the questions, and there were three of them to choose from. The three questions were all related to human relationships and connections, but the one in the middle seemed to be calling out to Soobin patronizingly on the page. 

_What roles do love and affection play in your life? ___

____

____

When Soobin looks up again Kai is looking at him expectantly, gaze soft and sincere and a soft smile on his lips to match as he awaits the answer to which question he’ll choose. It’s almost like he’s seeing his demise right in Kai’s gaze, like he knows how this is going to end. Kai didn’t seem evil or like he had any ulterior motives at all, he seems like a sweet, innocent baby deer. Bambi. But Soobin just has a nagging feeling in his chest telling him that this is his end. The this in question being Kai, of course. 

“I like the second question”, Soobin gives him a small smile back, looking away afterward and gazing back down at the page because they’d definitely been making eye contact for too long. 

“So, I’ll give you time to think and I’ll record your answer on my phone and type it up later. You don’t have to worry about having a perfect answer or anything like that, just whatever feels right to you.” Soobin learns quickly that Kai is a very patient and kind person, he’s like comfort. 

The question is a loaded one for Soobin and a stupid one to choose as he’s very pessimistic when it comes to love in the romantic sense. He wonders how someone as sweet as Kai would react to him speaking about love honestly. But he figures that for the sake of the experiment he should be honest. So he thinks about it for a second, sees Kai pull out his phone, and get the voice recording app pulled up. After a pregnant pause and a while of thinking, Soobin signals to Kai with a nod that he can start recording. Kai repeats the question: _What roles do love and affection play in your life? _Soobin responds.__

____

____

“I think love is something like a spectrum. There’s romantic love, familial love, platonic friendly love. Personally, I’m not a fan of love in the romantic sense. I sort of… ruled it out in high school because I thought it was a waste of time and I’d seen how it hurt my friends. I thought it was something I didn’t need and it began to annoy me because love is everywhere. Inescapable. Films, music, literature, on the sidewalks on the way to and from school. I became really pessimistic towards it, and I still am honestly. However, I think it’s undeniable that love is special. I love my family and my friends. I’m affectionate with them in the platonic sense, hugs and smiles and offering a shoulder to cry on. It’s an innate part of life I think, loving and caring about people. I just don’t see the point of romance I guess.” 

“Is that all you want to say?” Kai’s gaze is undecipherable but his finger is hovering over the stop button on his phone. Soobin nods and just like that the recording is ended and he’s done with the first part of Kai’s project. 

“Did I come across as too blunt? Was that okay for the project?” Soobin doesn’t know why he feels bad about his answer when it was the truth. (He could’ve been even harsher but figured that wouldn’t have been appropriate, and that he got his emotions across fine.)

“No, that was perfect. It was honest. Yeonjun told me a bit about you, by the way. So it wasn’t too much of a surprise.” And Kai is looking at him a bit differently, gaze shifting to something a bit heavier before it’s gone, as if Soobin had completely imagined it. Why was that somewhat daunting? What exactly had Yeonjun told him? 

The two of them exchange eye contact for a few seconds again and it’s like Kai is searching his eyes for something Soobin doesn’t know he’ll ever find. It’s over quickly and Kai gives him that soft smile of his again, looking ever so pretty and like something out of one of Soobin’s nightmares. His demise. A boy too pretty for his own good with an air of mystery to him. The worst thing a pretty boy could have because Soobin desperately wants to figure him out. 

Soobin exchanges numbers with Kai and the younger boy tells him that they’d need to meet again next Saturday, and the final meeting for the project would be the Saturday after that. He also asks Soobin a few more questions about himself so he can have more background for his project and the introduction that he’d give about Soobin in his paper. He records those as well, the two of them giggling at some bits and getting through the awkwardness of meeting a person for the first time that way. 

Somehow they end up talking about Soobin’s major and how he wants to pursue philosophy but had to be realistic, for himself and his family. As sad as denying what your heart and interests are calling you towards, Soobin figures it’s even sadder to be broke and jobless in a capitalistic world that money runs. Kai lets out a sad chuckle at that, eyes looking sadder and the seemingly permanent soft smile on his face faltering. 

Soobin has the sense to check the time on his phone at that moment and realizes the two of them have been talking for hours, midnight approaching when there was no way Yeonjun and Kai arrived any later than eight-thirty. 

“Woah, I had no idea I’d been here for that long. Sorry, I’ve probably overstayed my welcome. Um, I’m gonna get to my dorm now. Thank you so much for agreeing to help with my project it really means a lot.” Kai seems alarmed and a bit flustered, and Soobin doesn’t say anything for a beat because the younger boy is so damn endearing, he feared he’d coo at him if he opened his mouth to speak before he could think. That’s new. 

“No, it’s fine I had a lot of fun, Kai. You’re so entertaining I didn’t even notice we’d been talking for so long. You should probably get going though it’s really late.” 

Kai nods and both of them raise from Soobin’s bed. This is when Soobin realizes the two of them had been sitting on it together all along, knees pressed against each other and both of them in a criss-cross position. He hadn’t even noticed. Kai gets up and stretches, a bit of his lilac sweater raising and Soobin is quick to stand up and head to the door before he could give his eyes the chance to see anything he shouldn’t.

Soobin is opening the door and turning around and when he does Kai is right behind him; way closer than he thought he’d be and the older boy has to stop himself before he jerks back hard enough to hit his head on the back of the door. That would be painful. As well as very humiliating. 

The side of Kai’s lips quirks up like he’d notice how scared Soobin was at their proximity, and if Soobin didn’t know before that Kai was secretly trouble, he did then. 

“Thanks again Soobin. I think you’re nicer than you think you are.” And Kai searches his eyes for a few seconds one last time before he smiles at him and leaves Soobin’s dorm, a goodnight being called once he’s a bit down the dorm corridor that Soobin echoes back belatedly. 

He closes his dorm door and presses his back into it, standing in silence for a moment before he dramatically slides down the door and puts his head in his hands. 

He comes to another realization later in the early hours of the morning, after he’d showered and when he was laying in bed, staring at the ceiling as he usually does as he contemplates existence and whatever else had been plaguing his mind lately. Only this time, the only thing he can think of is darling deep brown eyes and a small sweet smile. _That’s new. _  
-__

____

____

It’s Monday again when Soobin finally finds Yeonjun, the elder boy was definitely running from him which was useless on his part because not only are they best friends, they have the same noon math class. Soobin wondered if the boy would be dramatic and skip the class (he’d skipped it for more trivial reasons before) but he gets his answer when Yeonjun slinks in and slips next to him in the center of the classroom, a few minutes before their lecture starts. 

“I’m going to kill you,” Is all Soobin says, tone absolutely serious, and Yeonjun laughs like it’s funny. Like Yeonjun presenting him with the boy of his dreams (nightmares… the boy of his nightmares) was something comical. 

“He’s perfect for you and you know it. You should be thanking me,” Soobin doesn’t even want to look at him because he knows he has that smug smirk on his face, but he glances over anyway and sees that yes, he does. Soobin shoves him.

“You know how I feel about love. I don’t know why you thought this would change anything,” And Soobin is met with silence. He wonders if he shoved Yeonjun that hard, but when he looks over again he sees the boy simply pulling out his notebook and pencil like Soobin hadn’t said anything at all. 

Before Soobin can pry, their professor walks in and wastes no time beginning to drone on about math. Curious.

**Author's Note:**

> well... a bit of a cliffhanger? pls let me know what you thought! i'll try to have the next chapter up soon. thank you for reading :') <3


End file.
